IF YOU ONLY KNEW…
Disclaimer: This article or humorous commentary is in no way intended to offend anyone and further is ONLY provided as entertainment, a general overview or background information. This article is NOT legal advice or a legal opinion. You should not rely on any information gathered in this article as a basis for any particular course of action or a substitute for legal advice. Because every case is different, you should always seek formal professional legal counsel specific to your case. No warranty of any kind, expressed or implied, is given and in no way does this article constitute any attorney-client relationship. (Sorry. *wink* I’m an attorney…what’d you expect. You know we have legalese and disclaimers for everything.)
If You Only Knew
When people find out I am an attorney, it is inevitable there are certain things that are sure to follow. First the questions: “How old are you? You look so young.” “What type of lawyer are you?” Next follows the “story.” Almost everyone at one point or another has had some brush with the law and some injustice that makes for a great story to that person. I have heard them all, from the police allegedly beating someone within inches of life, to the disgruntled neighbor next door, to the crazed baby mama who seems to want blood, to the scary traffic stop. But then comes the BIG one, the big lines of questions: “I got a legal question for you….If I did…..then should I…? Do I have a case? What do you think?”
And it happens I think unintentionally. No harm meant. The person talking to me has gotten so excited in telling me their story that they have lost all consciousness of the rest of the world and have been pressing forward closer and closer like a lion going in for the prey. All the while, I am listening intently and by now have been backed into a corner of the room, the prey. And I know it happens to most attorneys. I have heard the horror stories. (Yes, we attorneys talk. Believe it or not most of us are friends or at least cordial, especially in a small legal community such as ours.) And the person means no harm. He or she just has an innocent story they are itching to get out and a question…or two or three or five. Now that I write about it, I smile.
As a new attorney, this would be the point I would freak, as most new attorneys do. In a desperate attempt to be freed from the death corner, I would just try to answer the question while making sense of their wild story. In the past, I would leave whatever the event was feeling flustered and exhausted from the ordeal until I stumbled upon the next person who started the cycle all over again.
Now that I am more experienced, (and have completed that rite of passage) I do something different. The first thing one of my favorite law professors advised on the first day is one piece of advice I wisely employ. Now I simply smile, slip them my business card, and politely say “Boy, sounds like you need to hire an attorney.” This is not to be mean to anyone. I am happy and anxious to help everyone.
But the thing I wish everyone knew, as I know most attorneys do, is that 1) most of us work a crazy number or hours and 2) the service we sell, the way we make our living and the way we put food on the table, is by our advice, our time, legal knowledge, research and expertise. When we are at mere social events, we honestly just want to relax and be “normal” for lack of a better word. Answering legal questions is work. If we go around answering legal questions after hours, essentially we are working around the clock nonstop for free. And that is not healthy for anyone.
Well after the questions are asked and the story is told, the last inevitable thing to follow is…you guessed it, THE LAWYER JOKE. “Did you hear the joke about the lawyer who….?” And that, well that is a different story.
Thank you for reading! If you like this article or found it helpful, be sure to read my others posted and stay tuned for future ones. Also, please leave comments here and be sure to tell a friend. If there is a topic you want to see or you have a general question, you can leave it here or reach me at nichole@kentuckianalaw.com.
